Honorine

Cover Honorine
Honorine
Balzac, Honoré De, 1799-1850
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In some natures love can never beon trial; it is, or it is not. When it comes, when it rises up, it iscomplete. --Well, that life of eighteen months was to me a life ofeighteen years; I threw into it all the faculties of my being, whichwere not impoverished by their effusiveness; they were exhausted bythat delusive intimacy in which I alone was genuine. For me the cup ofhappiness is not drained, nor empty; and nothing can refill it, for itis broken. I am out of the fray; I have no weapons left.... Having thusutterly abandoned myself, what am I?--the leavings of a feast. I hadbut one name bestowed on me, Honorine, as I had but one heart. Myhusband had the young girl, a worthless lover had the woman--there isnothing left!--Then let myself be loved! that is the great idea youmean to utter to me. Oh! but I still am something, and I rebel at theidea of being a prostitute! Yes, by the light of the conflagration Isaw clearly; and I tell you--well, I could imagine surrendering toanother man's love, but to Octave's?--No, never.

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