Nerves of Steel

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She hesitated, steeling herself to refuse his offer.  But then he was holding the door open for her, and she found herself sliding into the warm embrace of the front seat.Drake hurried around to the driver's side, got in, started the car and turned the heat on high.He turned to her.  "Thanks to you, I think we just made major progress on the FX epidemic." "Tell that to that homeless kid.  Or my patient.  I still don't know who Jane Doe is, and Fran's killer is still out there."  Everything she'd... gone through, all for nothing more than a first name and the hazy possibility of an origin for Jane Doe.  Not much to work with, but she'd call Adeena with the information as soon as she got home.She slumped against the seat, wishing that the heater could go higher, her body numb with exhaustion.  Maybe she'd call Adeena after she got some sleep."Didn't it occur to you that once Trautman knew you linked him with Jane Doe, he'd have to kill you?  That he couldn't allow you to connect him back to Three Rivers or the FX?"  He shook his head.  "Just how far would you go to help a patient?"  The edge in his voice forced a flare of indignation from her.  "My patient, my job, my responsibility--a lot like yours, Detective.""It's my job to risk my life, not yours.  My job to find Fran's murderer, not yours.  You could have been killed."  Now his eyes flashed with anger.Cassie sighed.  Didn't they go through this already?  "You wouldn't understand." "Try me.  What makes an intelligent woman fool enough to take risks to help a girl she doesn't even know?  What makes you think that Jane Doe wants to have her family back in her life?  Maybe she made herself anonymous in a strange city for a good reason."She massaged the scar on her thumb and stared out the windshield.  Because she was Cassie's, was the answer that she could never articulate.  How to explain that someone had to stand for the helpless, the hopeless, that she cared for day in and day out?  What words would make that feeling of responsibility sound real and not like some grand delusion?"I do what needs to be done," was the best explanation she could come up with.He nodded slowly at that, and Cassie thought she saw some glimmer of understanding cross his face."Why were you there tonight?" she asked, trying to keep her voice level."Doing my job," he replied.  She was silent, and he continued, "I remembered you found Jane Doe here and that other overdose was brought in from down here, so I headed over, hoping to find Trautman, his stash or both."She gave a taut laugh.  "And you got lucky."He exhaled loudly, and his hands tightened on the steering wheel.  "I got lucky," he agreed, but his voice had lowered.  "I saw Trautman toss you over the railing.  If I'd been a minute later..." his voice trailed off, and he looked away."Thank you," she said in a quiet voice.

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